Ticket Sales for Hambo’s Ark — April to July 2019

It’s been a while since we posted about the latest official ticket sales figures for people visiting Ark Encounter — the creationist tourist attraction built by Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo), the ayatollah of Appalachia. Our last post was Ticket Sales for Hambo’s Ark — Feb & March 2019, so we have some catching up to do.

As you know, Hambo has to pay a safety tax of $.50 (fifty cents) to the City of Williamstown for each ticket sold, and the results are available through the Kentucky Open Records Act (KORA). We’ve been getting that information from our clandestine operative in Kentucky, code-named “Blue Grass,” but we haven’t been posting about it lately. Now we have some catching up to do, so here it comes — four paragraphs of 4th grade arithmetic, which we hope we didn’t mess up.

The Monthly Safety Assessment Report filed by Hambo for April, 2019 reveals that Hambo’s Ark Encounter sold 79,908 tickets that month, and the fee due to the city was $39,554.00. For April of the year before, the number of tickets sold was 67,613, and the fee paid was $33,806.50. So this April Hambo sold 12,295 more tickets, an increase of 18%.

The Safety Tax Report for May 2019 reveals that Hambo’s Ark Encounter sold 90,803 tickets, compared to May of the year before, when the number of tickets sold was 73,353. So this May Hambo sold 17,450 more tickets, an increase of almost 24%. That’s a big increase!

The Safety Tax Report for June 2019 reveals that Hambo’s Ark Encounter sold 124,230 tickets, compared to June of the year before, when the number of tickets sold was 113,901. This June Hambo sold 10.329 more tickets, an increase of 9%.

And the Safety Tax Report for July 2019 reveals that Hambo’s Ark Encounter sold 160,124 tickets, compared to July of the year before, when the number of tickets sold was 135,922. This July Hambo sold a whopping 24,202 more tickets, an increase of 17%.

So there you have it. The last four months have been very good for ol’ Hambo. Each month was an improvement over the same month a year earlier. The droolers are flooding in, so to speak.

As always, we are grateful to our clandestine operative for his excellent work, and we look forward to many more years of having Hambo’s ark to blog about.

Copyright © 2019. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

• • • • • • • • • • •

. . Permalink for this article

Discoveroids Have A New Accomplice

If you want to dig into the latest mess at the Discovery Institute’s website, you’re welcome to do so. We’re just going to skim the thing, but if it appeals to you, then go ahead and jump right in. The new article at their creationist blog is Biology Textbooks and the “God-Talk” Problem. It has no author’s by-line. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:

Another school year is around the corner. Undergraduate biology students will once again take up their textbooks on a quest to explore the intricacies of life. Of course, these students are rarely exposed to a balanced assessment of evolutionary theory, including its empirical challenges.

A balanced assessment? BWAHAHAHAHAHA! That’s what creationists have been after ever since the Supreme Court ruled that public schools can’t teach creationism. Courts have also ruled that the schools can’t teach evolution and creationism — despite the Discoveroids’ futile Teach the Controversy campaign. So now they’re trying again to get a “balanced assessment” of evolution into the schools. This should be fun. They say:

[B]iology students will likely use a textbook that incoherently [Huh?] presents the case for evolution. Surprisingly, this muddle emerges from textbooks’ unprincipled use of theology [What?], of all things. In a recent journal article, “Damned if You Do and Damned if You Don’t: The Problem of God-talk in Biology Textbooks,” Stephen Dilley and Nicholas Tafacory argue that textbooks’ case for evolution falls prey to an intractable dilemma.

An “intractable dilemma” in the case for evolution? We took a look at that “journal article.” It’s in the second issue of a new journal from a website that calls itself the Blyth Institute. It’s not easy to find any information about them, but your Curmudgeon was able to learn a thing or two — from the Discoveroids.

As you know, the Discoveroids have their own, in-house “peer reviewed” journal, BIO-Complexity. If you visit their website, you will find this notice proudly posted:

The editors are please to welcome Günter Bechly and Jonathan Bartlett to the editorial team!

You already know who Günter is, but what about that other guy? The Discoveroids tell us at their BIO-Complexity website, right here:

Jonathan Bartlett is the director of The Blyth Institute, a non-profit organization focusing on research and education in a variety of STEM subjects.

So there you are. Now we know that Blyth Institute is — shall we say — buddy-buddy with the Discoveroids. And — big surprise — the Discoveroids are promoting a Blyth “journal” article urging a “balanced assessment” of evolutionary theory and its, ah, challenges. Do we need to dig any deeper? No, we don’t.

But if you want to read what the Discoveroids are offering today, go right ahead. And let us know if we’re missing anything we should know about.

Copyright © 2019. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

• • • • • • • • • • •

. . Permalink for this article

Self-Published Genius #97: The Sloppy Dresser

Creationists don’t generate any news these days, but there’s no shortage of them willing to write books. The total of these things in our collection is approaching 100, and today we have another new addition to our series about Self-Published Geniuses. This is where we bring you news of authors with a vanity press book in which the author claims to have made paradigm-shattering discoveries, and announces his work by hiring a press release service.

The title of the press release — it’s a long title — is Rev. David M. Brown’s Newly Released “Learning the ABCs: Apologetics, the Bible, and Creation” is an Awe-Inspiring Fount of Strength from a Brave Faith Defender. Like so many others in our collection, it was issued by Cision PRWeb, which says it’s “the leader in online news distribution and publicity.” Here are some excerpts from the press release, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:

“Learning the ABCs: Apologetics, the Bible, and Creation”: a powerful and well-built defense against those who decry readers of the Bible stories, events, prophecies, and overall accuracy of the Bible. “Learning the ABCs: Apologetics, the Bible, and Creation” is the work of published author Rev. David M. Brown, a person who was shunned [Shunned?] by his church, ridiculed by its leaders because of shoddy clothing [What?], and chastised due to his father’s failures, but managed to prevail against the odds.

Wikipedia lists several people named David Brown. One is a now-deceased astronaut. Another is an Anglican priest. Our author today doesn’t seem to be any of them. The press release quotes the author:

Brown writes, “Archaeology has progressed tremendously in the last seventy years, especially in the field of biblical archaeology. It’s estimated that there are now over 6,500 discoveries in this field, verifying, illuminating, or bearing evidence for many of the people, places, stories, and events mentioned in the Bible. [Gasp!] Yet when I ask most Christians to name three, they cannot.”

The quote from the author continues:

“The same thing is now being found in science. There are vast amounts of discoveries, most coming from secular science, proving the fallibility and inaccuracies of evolution and the big bang. [Wow!] Tremendous evidence is coming forth in genetics proving dinosaurs are less than ten thousand years old, genetics proving man has been here for only about six to seven thousand years, that we didn’t evolve from monkeys over millions of years, and more. [Egad!] Yet most Christians are not privy to this information. … Many cannot defend their Bible, nor lead others to believe in it. This book teaches how to witness and make disciples with valid evidence for the Bible while tearing down the walls of evolution.”

Wowie — scientific discoveries that tear down the walls of evolution! This is wonderful information! The press release continues:

Published by Christian Faith Publishing [Aha!], Rev. David M. Brown’s new book is a fundamental tool that will help readers build a strong foundation to defend their faith against those who would disbelieve them.

They say the publisher is Christian Faith Publishing. That’s a name we’ve seen before. Here’s their website: Christian Faith Publishing. It leaves no doubt — they’re a vanity publisher. They even let authors pay their fees on a monthly installment plan. Okay, with that, and the press release, we know the book qualifies for our collection. Let’s read on:

With this book, Brown aims to let readers discover that believing with blind faith is akin to believing with ignorant faith.

Read that sentence again, dear reader. Instead of believing with blind faith, you should believe based on the amazing evidence the rev reveals in his book. Another excerpt:

View a synopsis of “Learning the ABCs: Apologetic, the Bible, and Creation” on YouTube. [Link omitted.]

We’ll skip the YouTube promotion. But we did find the book at Amazon. Here it is! It costs only $17.95 in paperback, and it’s got 270 pages. Hey — Amazon has a “Look inside” feature, so go ahead — look inside! There are no reviews yet, but that’s understandable. The book has only been available since March.

You may have noticed that neither Amazon nor the press release gives us any information about the author — except that he was shunned because of his shoddy clothing. But now we know what we need to know. His book sounds fantastic! You’re gonna buy it, aren’t you? Who wouldn’t? When you do, tell ’em the Curmudgeon sent ya!

Copyright © 2019. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

• • • • • • • • • • •

. . Permalink for this article

Discoveroids Release Their Greatest Podcast

The Discovery Institute was founded in 1990. They flopped around a bit until they found a good source of funding, and then they devoted themselves to the purpose set out in their manifesto — the Wedge Document, drafted in 1998. That’s a link to the Wikipedia article which describes it. You can read the actual document at the NCSE website: The Wedge Document. Listed among their “Twenty Year Goals” is: “To see design theory permeate our religious, cultural, moral and political life.” That was very ambitious, so they gave themselves twenty years to accomplish that goal.

The twenty years have passed — and then some. What do they have to show for all the millions they’ve spent, the books they’ve written, and the videos they’re always promoting? That’s right — a big, fat nothing. All of their goals have failed. We told their sad tale before — see Discovery Institute: How Much Longer?

For a perfect example of where they are today, take a look at the latest gem to appear at their creationist blog: More on How Chimps and Humans Differ: Anatomy and Behavior. It has no author’s by-line.

Take a good look at their title. That’s right — after all this time and all the millions they’ve burned through, what they’re telling us is that they ain’t no kin to no monkey. Hey — wanna hear the old song? Here it is at YouTube: I’m No Kin to the Monkey.

Now that you’re in the mood, here are some excerpts from the Discoveroids’ post, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:

It seems obvious: humans and chimps, our presumed evolutionary cousins [Presumed!], differ markedly. But as Wesley Smith noted here yesterday [Link omitted.], it is not so obvious to the editors of Human Evolution.

Yeah, those crazy evolutionists think we’re closely related to chimps. Then the Discoveroids say:

On a classic episode of ID the Future [Ooooooooooooh! A Discoveroid podcast!], biologist Ann Gauger talks with host Sarah Chaffee about physiological, anatomical, cultural, and behavioral differences between humans and chimpanzees. Download the podcast or listen to it here. [Link omitted.]

Ooooooooooooh! Ann Gauger (a/k/a “Annie Green Screen”) is a “senior research scientist” at the Discoveroids’ Biologic Institute. She’s appearing together on one podcast with Sarah Chaffee, whom we call “Savvy Sarah.” Here’s her bio page at the Discoveroids’ website. This podcast has everything you’ve ever wanted, dear reader! The Discoveroids tell us:

Turning to the question of human origins from a shared ancestor, Dr. Gauger considers how long it would take to acquire the needed mutations by Darwinian mechanisms?

Ooooooooooooh! What’s the answer? Here it is, right at the end of the brief Discoveroid post:

Much, much longer than the available timeframe, she explains. [BWAHAHAHAHAHA!] This is Part 4 of a series. Find earlier episodes in the series here, here, and here. [Links omitted.]

That’s it, dear reader. And really, what else do you need to know? You ain’t no kin to no monkey. You’re a special creation of the intelligent designer — blessed be he!

Copyright © 2019. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

• • • • • • • • • • •

. . Permalink for this article