This brilliant and timely post was found at the website of Answers in Genesis (AIG), the creationist ministry of Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else. It’s titled The End of the World Is Coming Soon! — Unless It Doesn’t!, and it was written by Hambo himself, so you know there’s nothing better. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:
How long do we have left before doomsday scenarios begin to play out? Well, that depends on who you ask. A recent article [At Fox News!] highlighted several answers from prominent politicians and activists who argue we must take “immediate action” or crisis will arise by 2030; the “Climate Clock” says we must make drastic changes by 2029; Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez [The AOC creature!] said in 2019 that the world would end in twelve years; and still others say “the planet is dying” and we just have a few years left.
Egad, we’re doomed! Or are we? Hambo says:
But, as the article points out,
[Hambo quotes the article:] Advocates of combating climate change are increasingly invoking doomsday scenarios to pressure President Biden to take unilateral action to lower greenhouse gas emissions, despite a history of such claims falling flat. [emphasis added]
So who do we believe? Only Hambo can clear things up for us. He explains:
The “doom and gloom” claims of the past simply haven’t come to be. (I’m old enough to remember when global cooling was the perceived threat, and then it was global warming, and now it’s just climate change!) For example, Al Gore [Hee hee!] predicted the North Pole would likely be ice free for at least part of the summer by 2013. That has yet to happen.
This is so confusing! Hambo continues:
Really, this zealous climate activism is a false religion with false prophets. [Gasp!] These activists and scientists have no idea what is really happening or what is going to happen. And they ignore much of the history concerning climate data. That’s why the predictions are constantly wrong! They have the wrong starting point (man’s word) and the wrong history (evolution and millions of years), so they come to wrong conclusions about the future.
There’s nothing worse than a false religion. Fortunately, Hambo will guide us to The Truth™. Let’s read on:
This false religion is inconsistent because, from their secular perspective, when these people die, they’re done. [Egad!] That’s it; they won’t exist anymore. Eventually everyone dies and ceases to exist, and someday even the universe dies. So, life is ultimately purposeless and meaningless — so why even care?
What a horrible religion! Hambo explains:
Well, it’s ultimately all about them being their own god and worshipping themselves and the creation, rather than the Creator (see Romans chapter 1). It’s their religion as they attempt to make some supposed “purpose” for themselves in their (self-inflicted) meaningless existence. It’s what happens when people worship the creature rather than the Creator.
Truly, that’s a horrible religion! But fear not — in his final paragraph, Hambo clarifies everything:
But we don’t need to wail and bemoan the future. The only true Creator has promised, “While the earth remains, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night, shall not cease” (Genesis 8:22).
Now you know everything you need to know. All that talk about climate change is for fools! Isn’t Hambo wonderful?
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