Springboro School Board: Kelly Kohls Is Retiring

We have some unfortunate news for those who find the antics of creationists to be endlessly entertaining. You recall our earlier posts about Kelly Kohls, President of the School Board of Springboro, a suburb of Dayton, Ohio. She also heads the local tea party organization.

Kelly came to our attention because, as we recently wrote in Springboro School Board: Once More into the Ark, she wants to add creationism to the public school curriculum, and she’s been putting that issue on the agenda of every Board meeting. Each time the topic came up it met with opposition from parents, so she would carry the matter over to the next meeting — thus creating perpetual chaos.

When Kelly isn’t presiding over meetings of the School Board or the Tea Party, she’s a professional nutritionist, so we’ve been referring to her as the creationist nutritionist. We were starting to like her. What blogger wouldn’t?

But now, at the website of television station FOX 45 of Miamisburg, Ohio, we read Springboro School Board President Not Running for Re-Election. WARNING: if you click over to that site, there’s a news video that starts right up. Auto-play is an obnoxious but common feature of news sites.

The text news is very brief. It says:

Springboro Community School Board President Kelly Kohls has announced she is not running for re-election.

Darn! We were counting on her to amuse us for months to come. Why is she dropping out? We’re told:

She’s been a controversial board member, and says she feels it’s the right time for her to move on. “I will still attend the meetings, I will still give my input, but I believe that someone else can take the position, and continue on with the direction.

That’s it? She just wants to “move on?” No, there’s a bit more to it. Let’s read on:

I need to free up my time, to make more education influence happen at the state level and perhaps at the national level,” says Kelly Kohls.

Aha! Kelly has ambitions for higher office. Perhaps we haven’t seen the last of the creationist nutritionist Here’s a Curmudgeonly prediction: If Kelly gets nominated for any important office, her opponent is sure to win.

Copyright © 2013. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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10 responses to “Springboro School Board: Kelly Kohls Is Retiring

  1. If that last sentence (“I need to..) is a verbatim quote, she needs a course in Remedial English.

  2. I’ve just learned that John Freshwater has been in contact with the Springboro Board of Education. See here. If you want to write it up, SC, I’ll link from the Thumb.

  3. Thanks, RBH, but it’s your scoop. You write it up and I’ll link to it.

  4. Not mine, exactly–I got it via the Thumb backchannel. But I won’t be able to write up a shorty until tomorrow at the earliest: I’m committed tonight. So go ahead.

  5. RBH says: “So go ahead.”

    There’s no rush. I’ll wait for you. Besides the fact that you gave me the story, there’s also the problem (for me) that I don’t know anything about the website where the story appears. I almost always get my news from traditional sources — except for a very few trusted sites like yours. So go ahead. If you post about it, then it’ll be okay for me.

  6. Okey dokie. I’ll try to throw something together now, before I have to get out of here.

  7. It actually is a smart move. Creationists only win by not crowing about their creationist credentials. She would have been sure to lose.

  8. Probably, like Palin, she believes that by resigning, she’s going on to bigger, better things. First the national stage… then the cosmic.

  9. “creationist nutritionist”

    Can we shorten this to “creanut”?